Over the Christmas holiday in December, I took a vacation for a family reunion. Eighteen members of my extended family were congregating--a monumental event to take place in Texas. Of course, I brought my camera along to record it.

As the vacation progressed, I noticed that my approach to recording family events--the frequency with which I pulled out my camera, the types of things I photographed, the quantity of photos that I shot--was drastically different from my approach as a wedding and portrait photographer.

The source of this difference is what I'll call "respecting the moment."

Many other photographers, I'm sure, have written about this--the way that covering an event or simply looking for opportunity have a way of altering your perspective and taking you out of the moment. You stand outside the event or environment, and observe in a global fashion. With events, I watch for the energy of the group to change in order to anticipate a laugh, or a quiet, touching moment. WIth the environment, I spend more time exploring nooks and crannies, watching the light and construction of the room, or examine the surrounding area for visual monstrosities that might become obstacles.

But with family, you have to relate at the same time. You are much more mentally inside the event or environment, because you are an integral part in creating it. Being the photographer in a family means you are given less slack, in a way, when your flash is too bright, or Aunt Bernice is getting uncomfortable, or the cousins are tired, et. al. Because of this deep relational element, you have to respect the moments that are being created in a different way, sometimes by abstaining from photographing altogether.

And I think this is the reason why I feel that so many photographic opportunities are missed when I spend intensive time with my family. You could also say it's the reason why so many family photos are often bad photographs. Many family photographs are taken more as afterthoughts. They act as a record that a laugh or quiet moment happened, but are not a record of the actual moment itself, because the photographer was too busy being in the moment when it happened.

So a balance--"respecting the moment"--must be struck. When photographing family, I try to think in advance about what events are going to happen throughout the day, and what specific times and events I would want to have my camera ready. That way I can feel at ease with missing a few "opportunities" if I feel that I'd rather relax into the moment, or if it would be annoying or inappropriate for me to be in everyone's face with a camera.

And come to think of it, when it comes to my family, more often than not I'd rather be in the moment with them, laughing away. Those moments are precious to enjoy, and good photography can coexist with them.